On the rare occassion that I am able to blog, it's even more rare that I am able to blog outside...with no coat...basking in the sun...in January. As I write this, I am watching my children wash their truck and tractor...only imitating what they have seen their parents do on these lucky weather days that we have been having. We are playing in the sun today, but tomorrow we will likely be playing in the snow! Both are equally exciting for us. These are the kind of days that I am ready to throw all the rules out the window...skip naps and just play all day. We tried something similiar yesterday and as much fun as we had, I am not sure I could do it every day. These kiddos really need their sleep. My house was an utter mess but my kids were so happy to have the whole day with me. I figured we will be stuck inside eventually due to cold weather, so we might as well enjoy being outside. I thank God for days like these and I truly feel that God has blessed me personally with them. He just knew it was what we needed. I love being a part of His plan. There has got to be some strange explanation for these warm days other than global warming!
I am still struggling with anxiety some but it has been improving as I have been handing things over to God and relying on Him more. That is all that I really needed...I had just forgot how. As I have been evaluating my life over the past year, when the anxiety starting kicking in, I realized I have been slowly taking the control away from God and trying handling things on my own. Sure, I still had my morning quiet time, bible studies, prayer time, etc but I really wasn't relying on God and trusting Him fully. Without even knowing it, I have slowly been letting the world take over the reigns of my life. There is no coincidence that I have been writing about that very topic since summer. I am sure that all that writing has only been for me to learn from. As I have been staring at the tip of the...now year (Know the Word more than the world)...I suppose, I need that advice more than anyone reading this blog. Further than knowing the word, it's really about applying the word to our lives. I know the word...I can quote and recite as much as anyone...but am I really believing it and applying it to my life? In some situations yes but in others no. I am now taking what I know and applying it to each and every situation. We hear so much advice, stereotypes, comments, etc I find myself constantly analyzing what I believe to be true and what God wants me to believe about it - what His truth says. There are many things we have heard or believed all our life, but it doesn't mean it's true or that it has to be that way, or that it is even God's way. There a couple that have hit me recently. Here are a couple of examples - 1 small thing and 1 big thing that we have heard that we believe. Whether big or small, the things we believe effect the way we believe and sometimes we "infect" what others believe because of it - especially our children. Here's a small example. Have you ever heard the comment "Three is a crowd"? Do you really believe that is true? Do you think God believes that or would allow that to happen in any of His relationships? I don't think so. I don't believe it for one second. Why does three have to be a crowd? Because people have told us it is? It's all in what you believe to be true. If you make 3 a crowd, then I guess it will be. Sure, having 3 in a group might be a little more difficult than have 2 or 4, but maybe God planned it that way to have you work through something that might be somewhat uncomfortable at first. If we love others above ourselves, 3 is not a crowd.
2) I don't have time to do everything I'm suppose to do. I don't know how many times I have felt that way or heard other mothers say something similiar..."there are just not enough hours in the day". God created how many hours we have to spend and also adviced us to rest...so He knows that there are plenty of hours to do what God wants us to accomplish. If we change that train of thought, you will have more peace about what you accomplish. Give each one of your responsibilities in a day, over to God and let Him direct you on what matters most. I have so much more peace about the things on my list that aren't crossed off yet. Nancy Leigh DeMoss says in her book Lies Women Believe, "The frustration comes when I attempt to take on responsibilities that are not on His agenda for me. When I establish my own agenda or let others determine the priorities for my life, rather than taking time to discern what it is that God wants me to do, I end up buried under piles of half-finished, poorly done, or never-attempted projects and tasks. I live with guilt, frurstration, and haste, rather than enjoying the peaceful, well-ordered life that He intends". She goes on to say "Frustration is the by-product of attempting to fulfill responsibilities God does not intend for us to carry. Freedom, joy, and fruitfulness come from seeking to determine God's priorities for each season of life, and then setting out to fulfill those prioritites, in the power of His Spirit, realizing that He has provided the necessary time and bility to do everything that He has called us to do." How freeing is that? I can't tell you how many times I have wondered what other moms do in their day. In fact, there have been many times I just ask my other mommy friends what they do during the day. Then I find myself frustrated if I am not doing something similiar - guilty for not spending as much time with the kids or not have a well oiled cleaning schedule. God calls each of us as moms to different responsibilities. The service we provide for our husbands and children will be different. Even what my own husband thinks I should do, is not necessarily what God wants me to do. It's our job to talk those through so we can be in understanding with what God wants us to do in our families. We need to go to God to discern what it is exactly that He wants us to accomplish - not what the world (our friends, other parents that give unwanted advice, even professionals/doctors, say Dr Phil) say we should accomplish during the day.
I just started a bible study in the book of James called Mercy Triumphs by Beth Moore. It was no surprise to me that even in this study I would find evidence of reyling on God over people. In today's scripture we looked at Galations 1:11-24. 11 and 12 says "Dear brothers and sisters, I want you to understand that the gospel message I preach is not based on mere human reasoning. I received my message from no human source, and no one taught me. Instead, I received it by direct revelation from Jesus Christ". Where are you receiving your messages from? How many times have we placed importance on the things we see our friends and family members do? Things like: "She has a job outside the home...maybe that is what is important"...or "she makes all her food from scratch...maybe I am suppose to be doing that" or "her house is always clean...maybe I should clean more". Each person needs to find out what is important to God for their life. Discern with God, not with a human source.
For me right now, the below pictures represent where I am suppose to be right now.
The book "Lies Women Believe" is really helping me to see these truths and use them each and every day. We have 4 ladies who are studying it together and plan to meet in the next couple of weeks to go over it together (chapters 1 and 2). The offer is still up if anyone wants to join us.